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Breast Feeding should not be attempted by fathers with hairy chests, since they can make the baby sneeze and give it wind.

~ Mike Harding ~
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He once had his toes amputated so he could stand closer to the bar.

~ Mike Harding ~
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If little green men land in your back yard, hide any little green women you've got in the house.

~ Mike Harding ~
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The Ruffed Padanga of Borneo and Rotherham spreads out his feathers in his courtship dance and imitates Winston Churchill and Tommy Cooper on one leg. The padanga is dying out because the female padanga doesn't take it too seriously.

~ Mike Harding ~
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